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Thursday, January 12, 2006


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Arwen, I don't comment often, but I wanted to tell you that this is a beautiful post, and to thank you for it and for all the others this past year. I am blessed to have two small children, but I've learned from you and drawn closer to my own faith (also Catholic) as I work through other issues in my life right now. I'll be thinking of you today. Thank you.

I'm sorry, I'll be thinking of you today.

Arwen, I'm sorry--you're in my thoughts & prayers today.

I have been there so many times, Arwen. It still surprises me when the tears don't come with CD1. They always find their way, though. I know that it is healing.
I am thinking of you today.

Am I cold and heartless to not be sorry?

"Some call this the vale of tears, I call this the vale of soul making." John Keats

Your post proves you make more and more soul all the time, and then it grows exponentially when you share it and inspire others...

Cry away, Brave One, it makes the world come alive again.

PS CD 1 approaches for me as well, disheartened that my loss has knocked us off cycle, it was fun being in synch...

CD 1 sucks!! Are we just getting so immune to disappointment that we can't even cry anymore? That's bad huh?

As a new cycle starts it's like I lost hope. I would be delighted if something happened, but don't even hope much anymore lately.

I hope you get to feeling better. therapy is similar. I like to write with pen and paper and not type and replace the hot chocolate with a chai latte and we do the same things to cheer ourselves up...or keep ourselves going.

Ah, cycle day ones absolutely stink. My tears usually don't set in until about Day 2 or 3. On Day 1 I was usually just hoping that maybe I was just still "spotting."

Ah, cycle day ones absolutely stink. My tears usually don't set in until about Day 2 or 3. On Day 1 I was usually just hoping that maybe I was just still "spotting."


sometimes tears don't come - they just sit waiting for the perfect moment.

and still praying. Always.

I gave up on tissues a long time ago, all they do is make my eyes, face and nose even more red than they would be otherwise. Let it all drip-dry, I say, and then wash your face afterwards.

My favorite forms of therapy are much similar to yours; they're little joys. I know you'd trade all the little joys for one particular big joy, but the little ones have value too.

Don't know what to saw Arwen other than I'm sorry you're in so much pain and to thank you for sharing your journey so eloquently with all of us. God Bless.

Arwen, I'm so sorry.

Salt encrusted words make a surprisingly sweet gift.
So sorry you're in pain, and yet I'm grateful at how well you've expressed it. Beautiful, as always.

Your talking about the crystals of tears reminded me of this (your Dad and I learned it at the Leanne Payne coference):

All my wounds cry "Alleluia",
All my bruises honor You.
Every scar is now a trophy
Of the grace that brought me through.
And the tears I wept before You
When I did not understand
Are now diamonds of redemption
Shining in Your nail-scarred hand.
All my wounds cry "Alleluia";
You've redeemed them by Your own
Which You carried in Your body
From the manger to the throne,
Where Your priestly intercession
Has transformed my deepest pain.
All my wounds cry "Alleluia,
Alleluia to Your name."

I always applied it to emotional wounds from emotional causes, but it certainly applies to emotional wounds from physical causes, and even physical distresses such as Karis has to bear. May it become true for you, and truer as time passes!

I love you, and am always praying.


Thank you for reminding me of the special blessing of my children that I often take for granted. You're in my prayers.

Today is cd1 for me as well. I did my crying two days ago and then had a little hope yesterday and am now just trying to get through the day. My thoughts are with you.... (oh -- and I am delurking for the end of delurking week)

Thinking of you.

As always, thank you for being so real.

Ach, I'm so sorry for your pain.

In my tradition, we tell the bereaved, "May you be comforted among the mourners of Jerusalem" ... if that has any relevance to what you're experiencing.

hugs for you

Arwen, I am adding you to my prayer cards. I wanted to comment in your more recent post, regarding your sister and the conflicting emotions you feel.

I understand.

I will pray for joy to fill you, and for the Lord to grant you the deepest desires of your heart.
God bless-


I know comments to your post above are closed. I couldn't help myself though. I had to say something to you. Honey....your doing the best you can do. I have SOOOO been where you are over and over again. I have been married nearly 16 years and have 3 beautiful children through the miracle of adoption but I never became pregnant. I have come to terms with it now but there were many a time I had to cry, scream, act like a total ungrateful baby when someone close to me became pregnant. Like you's not that I didn't want them to be pregnant, I just couldn't understand why not me? Your's okay....God understands. I so wish I could really know you. I longed for someone in my situation that could really understand to walk with me through this journey. I just wanted to say you are loved, and what your going through is so normal. Your sister will understand if you cannot be wholeheartedly there right now. God loves you and he will meet you where you are. Feel the grief, it's okay. Don't be too hard on yourself. I'm sorry if I overstepped my bounds here. Let me know if I have and I won't do this again! God Bless You!

praying for you! I'm just a few days behind you... CD1 was Saturday for me & it was really rough :(

Arwen, I saw your name on a different post (amalah's)and came here. I, too, am named Arwen Elizabeth. My parents read the books to eachother while courting and decided if they ever had a girl they would name her Arwen or Galadriel. I was the last pregnancy my mother had, she told me once she miscarried 7 times in her life - she had two children - and she didn't have me until she was almost 38. I wish I had comforting words for you.

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