abc family

Mind-numbingly Introspective

In case you haven't been following along over there, this past week was my first week of blogging daily (M-F) at Faith & Family Live.

I am really loving my F&F gig. When Danielle first contacted me about it, I was thrilled because I have a long-term goal of writing for something other than self-publishment, and this was a step in that direction. Plus, it's a totally great project to be a part of! I did, however, sort of see it as a moment of truth: this could have been where I learn that I have no ability to write for anyone other than myself, that the stress is too much for me and the only kind of writing I'm actually cut out for is personal blogging and journaling.

Fortunately, it did not turn out that way, and blogging at Faith & Family Live! is incredibly rewarding and fun. Unfortunately, for this site at least, it also takes a significant amount of writing time... and I have not yet gotten good at managing my writing time to make time for this blog as well.

This is, of course, in addition to the widely-recognized fact that I have not been that great at keeping up this site since Camilla came along. One post a week is the best I do most of the time, and that is when I'm on the ball.

However, the blogging gods will get Arwen/Elizabeth from me when they rip it from my cold, dead hands. This site is important to me, seldom-updated though it may be. I like knowing that I have a space on the web where I can write and get feedback on the things that are personal to me.

And you know, they say that the way to get yourself to write more... is to write more. If that's true, then blogging at F&F - which is stretching my idea muscles and my writing muscles in all kinds of good ways - should ultimately help me with the upkeep of this site. Once I get into the groove of posting five times weekly there, I hope to be here more too. I'll try to start sooner rather than later.

Have a beautiful Sunday!

Better Stuff Elsewhere

So far I've been having fun with Nablop, but I have to admit I'm getting a little tired of the sound of my own voice, or the view of my own words, or whatever you want to call it.  So today I'm going to write about some things I've been enjoying in other parts of the blogworld lately, so that in case you didn't know about them, you can enjoy them too!  If you're already clued in to all these things, I apologize in advance.

Lindsay is possibly the sweetest, kindest person in the entire world.  Well, she may not be sweeter than you, but she's sure as heck sweeter than me.  She's been through a lot of awful stuff in her twenty-one years of life, and yet she's neither hardened nor cynical, and in fact just radiates sweetness and light.  You should be reading her.  It will soothe your soul.  And if soul-soothing doesn't do it for you (what?  Are you crazy?) then maybe funny-bone-tickling will.  This entry makes me laugh every time I think about it.  Also, today is Lindsay's birthday, so hop over there and wish her a happy one while you still have the chance!

Blog Nerd may or may not be distantly related in some way to a blogger we knew and loved who has retired her personal blog.  I couldn't give you a definitive answer on that.  But what I can say is that I'm loving the nerd blog, and I think you will love it too.  Blog Nerd discusses any number of topics, and not all of them are my personal interests, but she is intelligent and witty enough to make even an insanely long discussion of nutrition and weight loss both engaging and hilarious.  Plus, Blog Nerd embraces her inner nerd and celebrates nerdiness.  As a major nerd myself, I can get on board with that.  (Fair warning: her site has a music player that loads automatically, so mute your computer if you're in a sound-sensitive environment.)

I mentioned that my Mom is doing NaBloPoMo, but those of you who haven't surfed over there might not know that she's writing a series of posts about my siblings, a "mom's-eye view" as she calls it.  I'm finding it fascinating.  I am kind of bummed that she skipped me, figuring that people who wanted to know about me could just read my blog (oldest children ALWAYS get the short shrift!  Have I ever told you about how I wasn't allowed to get my ears pierced until I was thirteen?  I was practically in high school already).  But I've registered my complaint with her and she's promised to circle back and talk about me at the end.  And in the meantime, I'm really enjoying reading her stories about my siblings, who are pretty much the greatest siblings ever to have walked the earth.  I'm sure reading about them will enrich your life too.

The ex-JenEx, who is even more smart and charming in person than she is on the Internet, has a new-ish blog that is plenty o-fun, with a good helping of Jen's intelligent and straight-shooting commentary thrown in.  This post had me both snorting and nodding my head so vehemently my eyeballs nearly ended up on my keyboard.  And the picture in it inspired Jen to make an entire set of LOLkids, which is one of the funniest things I've seen in I don't know how long.  Check it out.

Now it's your turn: tell me what you're enjoying on teh Internets these days!

Tidbits and Follow-ups

Someone mentioned Milla pictures, and I realized that I haven't posted any pictures of her in November!  Crazy.  I thought I had no good recent ones because there weren't any on the camera, but then I remembered the handy Mac tool of Photobooth, and sure enough, there were a few cute ones in there. 
They have the disadvantage of nearly always having a parent in them to detract from the beauty of the baby, but what can you do?  I'm just going to stick them in here randomly.  Pretend it makes sense with the content.

This sleeper was deemed too fruity for Daniel, so Camilla inherited it.  We think she can totally pull off the jungle-animals look.

Speaking of cameras, remember how I thought ours was on the fritz?  We'd charge the batteries and put them in and manage to take about two pictures before they'd declare themselves uncharged again.  Rechargeable batteries do die eventually, so we replaced them with new ones, but it kept happening.  We figured it must be the camera, until it occurred to us that... wait for it... the problem could perhaps be the battery charger.  And it was.  And we charged the batteries with our other charger, and we have a working camera again.  Ta da.

Speaking (as we are now) of batteries, does the battery life on your laptop stink?  It's probably your own fault.  I figured this out in college when my friends with laptops would oh-so-responsibly bring their laptop chargers to class and plug them in so as to ensure their laptops wouldn't shut down before the lecture was over.  I was too lazy to be bothered to do this.  But here's the thing: my laptop battery had easily three to four times the life that my friends' batteries did.  Even the friend who had the exact same computer as I had.  Based on this, I crafted the theory that constantly running your battery down to near-zero is good for it.

My brother, who recently graduated from fancy-schmancy electronic technician school in the Coast Guard, confirmed that my theory is correct.  Something about the thingummy and the whatsit in rechargeable batteries makes them work better if they routinely get run down as much as possible.  This is true not just for laptops, but for cell phones and anything that you use a charger for.

I have to say I'm happy about this, because it's one area of life where being ditzy can serve me well.  Accidentally leave my laptop unplugged on the coffee table overnight?  Lose my cell phone in my handbag for three days?  I'm not irresponsible!  I'm taking good care of my batteries!

Sure, Mom.  Also, please don't kiss me this early in the morning.

People (uh, two of them, anyway) are interested in how to make roasted chicken stock, also known as brown chicken stock.  I'm not an expert, since I just do what Joy of Cooking tells me, but the difference between regular chicken stock and brown chicken stock is that when you make brown chicken stock, you roast the chicken with the vegetables for about an hour at 425 degrees before you cook it down.  This caramelizes the vegetables and makes the chicken lovely and brown and more flavorful.

Also, I appreciate the kind thoughts from all you cornstarch fans, but I prefer flour in my gravy.  I don't notice the taste of cornstarch one way or the other, but I hate that thing it does when you refrigerate the leftovers and it seizes up like Jell-O.  I'll be sticking with flour, and I will eventually learn to put enough in at the beginning, and then my Gravy Competence Level will be as high as I need it to be.

I'm just guessing here, but she is probably not pondering the flour vs. cornstarch question. 

Okay, see in that picture, the way the baby's hair sticks out from the back of her head?  I'm so not kidding: it ALWAYS looks like that.  I comb it and wet it down and make sure it's properly styled after her bath, but to no avail.  Twenty minutes later, she's got bits sticking straight out of the back of her head. 
For the zillionth time.

I have to admit that, as much as I moan about it, I'm secretly a tiny bit thrilled by her hair.  I have hair that categorically refuses to stick out or frizz up or do anything but cling to my head like the boring, flat mass that it is.  I can't figure out why it seems to like me so much when I do nothing but insult it, but there you have it: it clings.  Milla's hair does not, which gives me hope that when she's older it will be curly or wavy or at least not straight-as-a-bunch-of-sticks.  Her dad's got pretty good hair, so it's a possibility.

The Sleep Nightmare of Early November 2007 seems to be on its way out, thank heavens.  I think the people who guessed ear infection were probably right, although if it was an ear infection it was a very minor one.  Maybe just an earache?  I know from sleep regressions and this was definitely not a sleep regression.  On Monday night the Muffin refused to sleep on her stomach as she normally does, and would only sleep on her back for an hour or less at a time.

(Yes, I gave in and nursed her.  On Monday she was waking up every ten minutes after we got in bed, clearly uncomfortable, and after an hour and a half I decided that I could nurse her or I could kill myself, and it was clear which was the better choice.  She nursed Tuesday night as well, on a normal schedule again.  Tonight we are returning to the night-weaning, which is probably going to tick her off, but she's a baby so she doesn't get to vote.)

Did I mention the thing that Milla did the other night, when we were awake for so many painful hours out in the living room?  I was sitting in the recliner with her head on my shoulder, rocking her, and every two or three minutes she'd lift her head and kiss me very deliberately right on the lips, then put her head back down.  She did this dozens of times.  It was quite possibly the sweetest thing that's ever happened to me.

I love being a parent because even in the nasty, exhausting muck, there are so many beautiful pearls.

Housekeeping

Today is the last day of LoLiBloPoMo, and I'm proud to say I pulled it off!  Yeah, there was that one week when both my Monday and Wednesday posts were late, but they still happened.  That's pretty good for me.  I'd say things are looking good for NaBloPoMo.

Despite being desperately in need of ideas for what the heck I'm going to post about for thirty days, I'm pretty pumped.  (If you have ideas, post them in the comments, please.  I could use some help!)  Not just because of all the writing I'm going to be doing, but because of all the bloggers I love who are signed up for NaBloPoMo too, and will be providing me with reading material through the month.  Maggie's doing it.  Ariella's doing it.  Jen's doing it.  Tracy's doing it.  My MOM is even doing it!  It's going to be a rocking month.

To keep things rocking around here, I've come up with an idea.  Here it is: any reader who posts a comment on every entry I post during the month of November will receive a prize, hand-mailed by me, at the end of the month.  I can't say what the prize will be because I haven't thought of it yet, but I promise it will be cool.  Or at least not so completely lame that it makes you want to cry.

(I hesitated about this idea because I was afraid it make me seem egotistical.  "Pay attention to me, and I will reward you!"  But I've never tried to hide the fact that I, like any self-respecting blogger, love me some comments.  Besides, it could be fun for you, too - a way to participate in NaBloPoMo on a somewhat smaller scale.  You could make a theme to your comments, or post entirely in limericks or haiku!  See, you're excited now, aren't you?)

Ahem.  Moving on.

Last night was the tenth night of our experiment in night-weaning.  I'm happy (no, thrilled.  You have no idea how thrilled.) to report that the whole thing has gone far better than we expected it would.  Dr. Jay Gordon (whom I would like to send a present in gratitude for making our lives SO MUCH BETTER) warns that some babies will cry for up to an hour when you first start refusing to nurse them in the middle of the night.  We've been lucky, because in ten nights Milla has cried for a grand total of less than an hour.  These days, when she wakes up at all, she merely fusses for a few seconds before letting herself be patted back to sleep by her heroic father.

I was apprehensive before we started night-weaning, and considered putting it off for a few more months, but I'm so glad we didn't wait.  Considering how quickly she took to it, I'd say Camilla was definitely ready.  And *I* was incredibly ready.  It's nice to finally be getting some decent sleep again.

In case there are any baby-sleep junkies out here, here's a comparison of a typical night two weeks ago with a typical night now:

Two weeks ago (times are approximate):
8:30pm - rocked to sleep by Daddy
9:15pm - wakes up crying, rocked back to sleep by Daddy
11:15pm - wakes up crying, nursed back to sleep by Mama
11:30pm - parents to bed
2:00am - wakes up fussing, nursed back to sleep by Mama
4:00am - wakes up fussing, nursed back to sleep by Mama
6:00am - wakes up fussing, nursed back to sleep by Mama
7:30am - up for the day

Now:
8:30pm - rocked to sleep by Daddy
11:30pm - woken up by Mama to nurse before midnight
2:00am - wakes up fussing, patted back to sleep by Daddy
6:00am - stirs, patted back to sleep by Daddy
7:00am - wakes up fussing, nursed back to sleep by Mama
8:30am - up for the day

We're still hoping and expecting that it will get better.  We'd love it if she would sleep through the night, although it'll probably be a while before we cut out the 11:30pm feeding - she still nurses a lot and seems very hungry at 7:00am.  Since I, an adult, don't have the ability to go twelve hours without food, I'm not going to fault my one-year-old for not being able to do it.

At any rate, I feel like I've got a new lease on life.  Does anyone want to come over and party?

One more thing before I go: I've gotten a couple requests that I share my meal-planning and grocery-list making tools.  Normally I'd just email these people personally, but November is nearly here and I Need Material, so I'll be doing a post on it, complete with screenshots, one of these days.

I bet you're all pumped for NaBloPoMo now, aren't you?

LoLiBloPoMo

I just signed up for NaBloPoMo.  This means I'll be posting every day through the month of November.

(Clearly I have an inflated sense of my own abilities.  I am not exactly a posting-often rockstar.  But people can change!)

I probably post 10% of the things I consider writing here.  Even if half that stuff isn't worth writing about, I'm still only posting 20% of the things I should be posting.  Lately I've found myself constantly regretting the fact that I'm not recording more of these lightning-fast days.  Committing to NaBloPoMo is a step toward changing that.

To get my writing muscles flexed and toned before Thanksgiving month, I'm declaring October to be Local Lite Blog Posting Month.  I'll be posting Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays throughout this month. 

I hate that I'm announcing this.  In an ideal world I'd just go ahead and do it, but in the real world I am pathetic with follow-through.  I'd plan on doing it, but then I'd get busy or distracted and think, "Oh, well, I didn't tell anyone I was going to do it, so no one will know when I don't."  And that would be that.

If you get up on any given Tuesday, Thursday, or Saturday morning and discover I haven't posted the day before, you have my full permission to send me an email complaining about it.  You may even use mild profanity.

(I grew up in a house where we children were not allowed to use the words "butt" or "pee."  As an adult, I consistently use the word "freaking" for emphasis.  Keep this in mind when considering the definition of "mild" profanity.  Heh.)

I hope I won't get a single email!

This month we'll take a ten-day trip to New England.  We will attend a high school football game to see my younger siblings in the marching band of which my sister is the drum major.  We will celebrate two birthdays, Bryan's and Camilla's.  We will go apple picking.  We will (hopefully) make donuts.  We'll obtain a Halloween costume for the baby, and hand out candy to neighborhood children.  We will read Moo, Baa, La La La approximately seven hundred times.

Oh, it's going to be an exciting month.

In case anything about this blog has confused you...

...here are your answers, on my brand-new updated-mere-moments-ago About page. 

Got any additional burning questions?  Email me or comment here and I'll answer them.

Squeeeeee!

Oh oh oh oh oh!  Please go over and congratulate my dear friend Maggie and her husband Phillip on the newest beautiful addition to their family!

Maggie and Mama Talk

When I found out a couple months ago that Maggie was coming to Michigan for a wedding, I knew it was a chance I could not pass up.  Exchanging frequent and hilarious emails is good, but meeting in person is so much better.  Plus, she was coming to a little lake-town on the other side of the state, and before we became parents Bryan and I loved to take weekend getaways to places like that.  We figured now would be as good a time as any to start getting back into the habit, so on Saturday morning we packed up the Muffin and drove cross-state to see Maggie and her husband, Phillip.

I would definitely suggest doing this if you ever get the chance.

(Meeting Maggie, I mean.  The town was neat, but probably not worth traveling cross-country just to see.)

Camilla loved Maggie and Phillip too.  I am muy bummed that they don't live closer.  It would be hard for them to babysit for us, living in Seattle like they do. 

See how comfortable Milla is?  Not only is she not crying, she is reaching for the wine menu, because she knows that Maggie is cool and will not judge her for drinking before noon.

Maggie's post about meeting us is totally un-toppable (and also way too flattering to me), but let me just say that I would drive three hours with a car-seat-hating baby anytime to see her.  So worth it.  We have just enough in common that we have plenty to talk about, and just enough not in common that the conversation is still interesting. 

And we have similar in-laws.  'Nuff said.

See?  Milla definitely loved her.  Milla does not let just anyone touch her feet.

Actually, I don't know if that's true.  *I* certainly don't let just anyone touch her feet, but for all I know Milla herself would be happy to let any random hobo play "This Little Piggy" with her all day long. 

Considering how attached she is, however, it's unlikely.

And here is where we move to the inevitable "mama talk" part of the post.  (You knew it was coming!  It had to be coming!)

I considered writing to Moxie about this question, but the poor woman just started a new job and I doubt she has a lot of extra time on her hands.  Sad.  But then it occurred to me that I have my own blog, and I can ask my own readers, wise and experienced as they are, to help me.

(And I know you will, because the lure of a blogger asking for advice is a strong one.  I know this because I have observed its effect on me.  I'll be casually surfing around and come across a post which asks for help with, say, picking out golf shoes.  Before I know it, I, who have never been on a non-putt-putt golf course in my life, am Googling "golf shoes best cheap" just so I can have the chance to give advice to someone I don't know.  The lure of advice solicitation is THAT STRONG.)

So, my baby.  Twenty-three weeks and five days (also known as five-and-a-half months) old.  (Insert obligatory "Waaaah, she's growing up so fast" here.)

For the first four months of her life she was fussy and super clingy, and we held her constantly because it was the only way to keep her happy.  Then, around four months old, she started being less hyper-needy.   She would actually let us put her down and walk away for a few moments.  I'm not talking long periods of time here: I was thrilled, for instance, that she was suddenly willing to lie in bed in the morning and chat with her feet while I brushed my teeth and put my contacts in.  She would sit in a chair on the kitchen floor and play happily while I completed the more dangerous aspects of dinner prep.  That kind of thing.

Bryan and I don't ascribe to any particular parenting philosophy, but the way we interact with Milla looks like attachment parenting in a lot of ways.  We sleep with her, we hold her pretty much constantly, we respond immediately to her cries, etc.  We developed this way of doing things because it proved to be the best way to keep our high-needs baby happy.  She *needed* us to do it.  So, when she started being a little less high-needs and a little more chill, I was secretly proud.  I thought we'd shown her, by constantly being there for her, that we would be there for her in the future and that she could relax a little.  She was secure!  She was happy!  Responding immediately to her every need had paid off!

But apparently not, because last week it all went wrong again.  And we did nothing differently, I promise.  Suddenly the girl just has major separation anxiety.  Not when we leave her - we never leave her - but simply when we're momentarily out of her sight.  I lay her down on the bedroom floor and step into the bathroom to grab a Q-tip, and as soon as she can't see me, it's immediate waterworks.  One night recently Bryan took her into the other room to change her diaper, and I heard WAILING.  It sounded like torture was going on in there.  When he came back to the kitchen with her, I asked him what he'd done.  He rolled his eyes.  "I put her down so I could wash my hands."  Ah, yes.  A cardinal sin in Camilla's world.

That makes it sound like we don't care about our poor daughter's woes.  But we do care, very much.   We're just confused, because it feels like we've reverted to an earlier, tougher stage in Camilla's life.

What I want to know from all you sage people is: did we inadvertently do something that caused this?  I seriously can't think of a single thing we changed, but maybe I missed something.  Or were we just naive to assume that "better" meant "permanently better"?  Is this just one phase of many?  She will grow out of it, right?

I need some help here.  Or some reassurance.  Either is good, both is best.

Okay, okay, one gratuitous picture.

Reciprocal Recipe

I'm thrilled that people are delurking!  It's been really fun reading all the comments.  I'm excited to try out the new cookie recipes, and thanks to your suggestions I have definitely decided to get at least one more carrier, although I have yet to decide what it will be.  There is a local store that carries all things crunchy, including quite a few brands of slings, pouches, and wraps, and I'm planning on heading over there tomorrow to try out some of them and decide what to buy.

Meanwhile, since you all were so kind to share your cookie recipes with me, here's my current favorite recipe.  It's easy, and also very very bad for you, which of course means that it's unbelievably addictive.

Lemon Bars
Mix 2 cups flour and 1/2 cup powdered sugar.  Cut in 1 cup margarine or butter with fork or pastry blender until you have a crumbly mixture.  Press into a greased 9x13-inch pan.  Bake at 350 degrees, 15-20 minutes, until golden. 

Meanwhile, beat 4 large eggs.  Mix in 2 cups granulated sugar and 1/3 cup lemon juice.  Stir in 1/4 cup flour, 1/2 teaspoon baking powder, and 1/2 teaspoon grated lemon rind.  Pour over hot crust, and bake at 350 degrees for another 15 to 20 minutes, until set.  Sprinkle with powdered sugar and cool.  Cut into bars, and try not to eat them all within a day.

My own variations/tips: 
- Sometimes I use lime juice instead of lemon, or I use a mixture of the two.  I think the mixture makes the most interesting flavor. 
- If you don't have lemon rind, you can skip it; the flavor will not be quite as good but the bars will still taste wonderful. 
- The crust and the filling both have a tendency to stick to the pan; I line mine with aluminum foil and grease that, making sure to have plenty of extra foil on the ends of the pan for handles.  Then, after it has cooled, I just lift the whole thing out of the pan and put it on a cutting board before cutting into bars.  Works like a charm.

I'll let you know what I decide in the sling department.  Kisses!

Delurk Because You Love

It's Annual Delurking Week, and while I may forget to write about my own birthday (and quick perusal of the archives shows that I did indeed forget this past year) (it was August 23rd, in case you're wondering, and I turned 24), I will never miss Delurking Week, because I love comments way, way too much.

More than comments, I love you (and you and you and you) and if you've been reading in secret, I want to know you.  It will make me happy!  Such a simple thing to do, and I'll be happy.  So leave a comment, please!

I also resolve, sometime this week, to leave a comment on every blog I read.  (Unless it is defunct.)  (Waaah.  There are way too many defunct blogs.)

Because I know some of you might feel silly just saying hi without a concrete topic, here is something to talk about: carriers.  I have a basic ring sling and an Ergo, and at this point we use the sling almost exclusively because the Muffin is too small for the Ergo without the infant insert and she is so over the insert, just put her in the sling already, gosh.  But since she is now approximately 14 pounds, the sling hurts my back if I wear it for too long (like for an entire grocery store trip) and I'm looking for something to use until she's big enough to fit in the Ergo comfortably. 

Slings are not out of the question; the problem could just be the sling I have, which is a basic padded ring sling that my husband's aunt had someone make for us.  I want to hear about any carriers you have really liked, and for what purposes and sizes of children they worked well for you.

And if you are not into baby carriers or don't have children, I'm also collecting cookie recipes - cookies being one of the only treats for which you can consistently find dairy-free recipes - and would love to hear about your favorites.

If neither of these topics interests you, talk about anything you want.  Or just say 'hi' and be done with it.  I'm easy; I just want to know you're there.